The 3AM Blues
by Thai Tea Addict
Summary: Ryoma calls in help to escape a tricky situation. Unfortunately for him, no one he knows is particularly helpful. OT6, Crack
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** : I'm playing too many games... (sighs)

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Prince of Tennis.

 **Warnings** : Text-based format, Crack-Humor

 **Pairings** : OT6 (SanaTezuAtoYukiFujiRyo)

* * *

 **The 3 AM Blues**

 _Part I_

* * *

Ryoma considered his Contacts list very seriously, weighing the options; on one hand, Momo was his best friend and would rise to the occasion if called upon, but on the other hand, he would never let Ryoma live it down. The other options were of course his fellow Regulars in the current Seigaku club, but out of all of them, he could only really rely on Kachirou or Katsuo.

Wake up. - _Ryoma messaged_.

Why are you awake! _-Katsuo._

It's 3am... wtf. - _Kachirou_.

Hypothetically speaking

If you woke up naked and can't find your clothes

What would you do - _Ryoma_.

omg - _Kachirou_.

wtf wtf - _Katsuo_.

"Don't be useless," Ryoma muttered to himself irritably. He froze when the person on his right shifted, one arm haplessly slung over Ryoma's lap.

Be serious. Help me. _-Ryoma_

Omfg - _Kachirou_.

Where are you?! - _Katsuo_.

Ryoma glanced about the room. _What to say..._

I think a hotel room. - _Ryoma_.

You think? - _Katsuo_.

Why are you naked lol - _Kachirou_.

That's not important. I need to break out. - _Ryoma_.

Are you locked in?! - _Katsuo_.

Kinky lol - _Kachirou_.

Kachirou, 100 laps at practice next week. - _Ryoma_.

kjdfdsfkdsf;anf - _Kachirou_.

Well, if it's a hotel room, then your clothes would be in the room somewhere... - _Katsuo_.

Ryoma, who had tried his best to peer around the room with his cellphone light and still trapped on the bed, glowered.

Fine, then not a hotel room. My clothes aren't here. No one's clothes are here. _-Ryoma._

...you aren't alone?! - _Katsuo_.

Who's there? - _Kachirou_.

That's not important. - _Ryoma_.

Omfg

It must be someone we know. _-Kachirou._

...1000 laps at practice next week. _-Ryoma._

;sfhdafdfndafndfj - _Kachirou_.

Well, it's kind of important we know who it is... since you might be at their house... - _Katsuo_.

Why would he confuse their bedroom with a hotel room then? - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma felt a nervous sweat break out on the back of his neck. He'd been trying to avoid that.

Wait - _Kachirou_.

No way. - _Katsuo_

Wait wait WAIT WAIT - _Kachirou_.

Shut up and focus! - _Ryoma_.

YOU'RE NAKED IN ATOBE'S BEDROOM? - _Kachirou_

I said FOCUS and help me get OUT! - _Ryoma_.

omfg _-Kachirou._

Ryoma stomped down on the urge to throw his phone across the room. Atobe, on his left, turned over onto his side and wrapped an arm sleepily around Ryoma's waist.

Ok so you're sleeping with Atobe... That's fine, that's totally fine, congratulations btw - _Katsuo_.

Oh yeah, congrats! _-Kachirou._

I don't need congratulations, I need clothes and a way out. - _Ryoma_.

It's not good to run from intimacy~ - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma was seriously going to kill his vice-captain.

Well, um, why don't you just...ask Atobe where...your clothes went... - _Katsuo_.

Are you serious

I'm not waking him up

If he wakes up then everyone wakes up

I want to escape not have a discussion about this. - _Ryoma._

Ryoma paused. _Shit_ , he thought upon realizing his error.

hdf;idhafidnsfnd - _Kachirou_.

Everyone?! What do you mean everyone?! - _Katsuo_.

It's a big bed, it fits a lot of people. - _Ryoma_.

WHAT - _Katsuo_.

How many people are there? - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma winced.

Five guys not including me. - _Ryoma_.

omfg - _Kachirou_.

Katsuo said nothing.

Omfg you were in an orgy i'm so impressed - _Kachirou_.

KACHIROU! _-Katsuo._

Can you even move? Doesn't your waist hurt? - _Kachirou_.

I'll manage. - _Ryoma_.

You beast~ - _Kachirou_.

FOCUS. _-Ryoma._

Hey hey who else is there? Do we know them too? - _Kachirou_.

Why are you so excited? - _Katsuo_.

Yeah but I'm not saying. - _Ryoma_.

I'm so glad i'm awake for this. - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma wished he wasn't awake for this. If his wait wasn't so sore, he likely would have slept through the night; as it was, now he was the only once conscious in a bed bigger than his bedroom, glowering at his cellphone. He glanced over at his companions - all were still blissfully sleeping. _It must be nice being unconscious for this_ , Ryoma thought.

Ryoma-kun's first walk of shame. I wish I was there to take pictures. - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma was going to have the other boy running laps until he _died_.

ANYWAY

There's no clothes in the room at all? That's weird, since there's so many people... Did you guys undress somewhere else? - _Katsuo_.

Lol kinky - _Kachirou_.

From what Ryoma remembered, they'd undressed and did everything in this room. By all accounts, his clothes should have been thrown to the floor along with the others'; he didn't know why they weren't there anymore.

Do you think he had a maid come in and take them away? - _Ryoma_.

Wow that is some A-plus service, I hope she's paid well. - _Kachirou_.

Why don't you try looking in the closet or the dressers? I think you can borrow someone else's in this case. - _Katsuo_.

Ryoma slowly untangled himself from the jungle of limbs he'd felt encased in; Fuji made an irritated moan, but settled quickly enough into Sanada's side. Maneuvering carefully over his bedmates, Ryoma nearly tripped off Yukimura's torso but caught himself before he could fall into Tezuka's legs. His entire bottom was crying out at his movements, but Ryoma had suffered worse in tennis practice so he only soldiered on. Using his cellphone's flashlight, he checked under the bed - clean - and then moved over to the closet. The door squeaked when he opened it, but aside from a general restlessness, the bed behind him remained quiet.

Nothing but linen in the closet. No dressers. - _Ryoma_.

Are you walking around naked lol _-Kachirou._

Make a toga out of the linens? - _Katsuo_.

Ryoma pulled out one of the bedsheets. Of course it was the finest silk because Atobe, but Ryoma wasn't going to let that stop him; he wrapped it as best he could around his waist, so that it looked more like he'd misused it as a towel.

...I can't go home like this. - _Ryoma_.

Can you even go home? I bet he has good security. - _Kachirou_.

You should just wake him up. - _Katsuo_.

Ryoma would rather die.

Can't you just bring me clothes? - _Ryoma_.

How? You don't even know where you are! - _Katsuo_.

100 laps for being useless. - _Ryoma_.

Ooh, now he's taking out his anger on us~ - _Kachirou_.

That's not going to help your situation! - _Katsuo_.

Walk of shame! Walk of shame! - _Kachirou_.

Maybe he should have contacted Momo after all. At least the older boy had upgraded to a scooter recently, and wouldn't delight as much in Ryoma's suffering until after he had escaped it.

Wait why do you have your phone but not your clothes - _Katsuo_.

I put it on the side table before...everything happened. - _Ryoma_.

Nice priority - _Kachirou_.

Well if you're not going to wake them up, you only have two options

Either crawl back into bed

Or start exploring. - _Katsuo_.

Lol You just told Ryoma to explore Atobe's house lol - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma snorted. It's not like he could just stroll on out of the house in this condition.

...oh, there might be clothes in a different room. - _Ryoma_.

And thus starts the adventure - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma tried to leave the room as quietly as possible. Thankfully, the bedroom door didn't squeak and closed with a quiet click behind him. Admitted into view of the hallway, he was relieved to find it deserted; it was 3 in the morning though, so he wasn't expecting much.

Looking left and right, he couldn't discern which way would lead him to another room or even the exit. "Seriously, who needs a house this big?" he grumbled, stomping off in a random direction.

Doesn't anyone know Atobe's home address? - _Katsuo_.

It's not like it would be easy to find on the internet. - _Kachirou_.

Do you think I could get a taxi to pick me up here? - _Ryoma_.

Doubt it. - _Kachirou_.

Ryoma entered the first room on the right: a study. No possible things to wear. He continued on like that, meeting either empty rooms, bedrooms with only more linens available, or lounge areas.

If you were a bedroom in this stupid mansion, where would you be? - _Ryoma_.

Maybe he enjoys being nude when at home. - _Kachirou_.

Considering some of the things Atobe did wear, being nude could be considered the preferable option. Ryoma was only slightly biased. Still, running around a dark mansion at some ungodly hour in the morning after rigorous sex was more draining than Ryoma had thought it would be. As it was, not only was he getting tired, he was getting thirst too. Even his body was starting to ache, rebelling against his desire to escape.

Maybe I will just hide in a room and wait for everyone to leave. - _Ryoma_.

Omg

Don't do that

You'll scare the staff. - _Kachirou_.

I'm tired and I can't find the kitchen. - _Ryoma_.

You want to eat now?! - _Kachirou_

I'm thirsty. - _Ryoma_

Just how big is that house?! - _Kachirou_.

Where's Katsuo? - _Ryoma_.

Huh. Wonder where he went. - _Kachirou_.

If you went back to sleep, I'll make you drink Inui Juice at practice for the next YEAR. - _Ryoma_.

The threats! Have stepped up! - _Kachirou_.

I'm not sleeping!

I was trying to help. - _Katsuo._

Ryoma didn't even get to ask what for when his phone buzzed with a different group chat. Switching over into the new one, he grimaced at what he saw.

...And, uh, sorry about this. - _Katsuo_.

Ochibi! What's wrong! - _Kikumaru_.

Echizen are you ok?! - _Oishi_

Echizen! - _Kawamura_

Where are you? Do you need a ride? - _Momo_.

I'm surprised you're even awake right now, Echizen. You generally sleep in on the weekends. - _Inui_.

...Katsuo, at practice, you better start running laps and never stop. - _Ryoma_.

Senpai! Good morning~! - _Kachirou_.

I was just trying to help! I thought they might know where Atobe lived! - _Katsuo_.

He said you're in Atobe's house and can't leave? What happened? - _Oishi_.

Yeah, what happened? lol - _Kachirou_.

Doesn't matter. Trying to leave. Get me out. - _Ryoma_.

I've never been to Atobe's house personally

But Fuji, you've been there right? - _Oishi_.

A cold sweat broke out over Ryoma's entire body. _No_ , he thought in alarm.

Yes~ - _Fuji_.

 _No no no_ , Ryoma thought.

Never mind. I'm already out. Long gone thanks anyway. - _Ryoma_

What about your clothes? - _Katsuo_.

HIS CLOTHES? -Oishi.

WHAT -Momo.

OCHIBI! - _Kikumaru_.

Ryoma dashed into the closest room - another lounge. He thought about hiding, but that seemed a little too extreme; there were so many rooms in the house anyway, it woudl be hard to find him no matter what. He would just wait here...until morning... And beg the cleaning staff for help in smuggling him out, if all else failed.

It's fine. I'll bring something he can wear. - _Fuji_.

I said I'm not here anymore. - _Ryoma_.

Where are you? - _Kawamura_.

Dead on the side of _the_ road. - _Ryoma_.

What happened

Why are you being so difficult now - _Katsuo_.

Shut up - _Ryoma_.

Omg

Omg omg - _Kachirou_.

What what's happening! - _Oishi_.

Something great just occurred to me. - _Kachirou_.

...no way. - _Katsuo_.

Echizen you're running around naked? - _Momo_.

Lol - _Inui_.

Inui-senpai, why is that funny to you? - _Kaidoh_.

wtf Mamushi's here?! - _Momo_.

Did you want to play Hide and Seek, Ryoma? - _Fuji_.

Ryoma curled up on the couch in the furthest corner. His whole body seemed to sag in relief, but contradictorily, his muscles were tense with adrenaline; it was as if he instinctively knew he was being hunted. "Ryoma-kuuun~!" Yukimura's voice sung out sweetly from the hallway.

I'm going to die. This is all your fault Katsuo. - _Ryoma_.

I'm sorry! - _Katsuo_.

What's going on? - _Kawamura_.

I'm dead. - _Ryoma_.

Ya. - _Fuji_.

WHAT - _Oishi_.

An intercom buzzed to life in the hallway. "Brat, the house is practically locked down. Just come out."

I refuse. - _Ryoma_.

So you are still in the house lol - _Fuji_.

Ryoma could only inwardly curse at himself. His phone buzzed with an incoming call: Tezuka. Ryoma stared at it for a long moment - he could just get this over with right now, because at this point he was only delaying the inevitable. Another second later, he rejected the call.

Stop being stubborn. - _Tezuka_.

Lol you actually hung up on your favorite Buchou~ - _Fuji_.

Wait - are you guys already at Atobe's place? - _Momo_.

Ya. - _Fuji_.

Give more details, Fujiko! - _Kikumaru_.

Tezuka-buchou is here too? - _Kaidoh_.

That's 3/5 of the mystery solved lol - _Kachirou_.

Another crackle from the intercom. "Playing hide and seek at 3 in the morning is a bit extreme, Ryoma. Come back to bed," Sanada said through the speaker.

Fuck you. - _Ryoma_.

So hostile! - _Kachirou_.

Don't worry, that was for us. - _Fuji_.

So uh...do you still need a ride, Echizen? - _Momo_.

Yes. - _Ryoma_.

No. - _Fuji_.

No. - _Tezuka_.

Lolol you were out-voted - _Kachirou_.

It's not a democracy - _Ryoma_.

Everyone can go back to bed. We will find Echizen. - _Tezuka_.

Save me - _Ryoma_.

Tezuka... Maybe I should go pick him up... - _Oishi_.

He's fine, Oishi. - _Tezuka_.

I'm not. Save me. - _Ryoma_.

Don't bully Ochibi! - _Kikumaru_.

He can't be in that much trouble if he's texting us and not calling the cops. - _Inui_.

Oh is that where our standards are? Until the cops are called we're fine? - _Katsuo_.

Does it remind you of our Xmas party? It reminds me of our Xmas party. - _Kachirou_.

No. - _Katsuo_.

No! - _Kaidoh_.

We don't talk about it! - _Momo_.

Lol what happened? - _Kikumaru_.

Oishi-senpai, save me. The rest of you useless idiots can leave. - _Ryoma_.

Lol he's irritated. - _Kachirou_.

A door further down the hallway was opened and closed. Ryoma tucked himself into the corner between the couch and table so that he wouldn't be in direct view.

I said it's fine. Go to bed. Ignore his texts. - _Tezuka_.

That sounds the opposite of fine. - _Kaidoh_.

Kaidoh, 100 laps. - _Tezuka_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

Lol You should have gone to different high school lolol - _Momo_.

Shut up, peach-idiot! - _Kaidoh_.

Tezuka... - _Oishi_.

Personal issues. We'll handle it. - _Tezuka_.

I don't want my personal issues handled. - _Ryoma_.

From what you've said, you've already been pretty well-handled lol - _Kachirou_.

Hm? - _Fuji_.

I'm sorry - _Kachirou_.

We don't know anything. - _Katsuo_.

Traitors. - _Ryoma_.

Self-preservation is an admirable trait. - _Inui_.

Ochibi... Are you still naked? - _Kikumaru_.

WHY do you want to know?! - _Kaidoh_.

I'm trying to come to grips with the scenario. - _Kikumaru_.

Lol - _Inui_.

Go to sleep, Eiji. - _Fuji_.

Now. - _Tezuka_.

...g'night. - _Kikumaru_.

Maybe I'll go back to bed too - _Momo_.

I hate you. - _Ryoma_.

Echizen! Don't be cruel! - _Momo_.

Don't worry senpai, he's just mad cuz he's hungry and tired. - _Katsuo_.

Such a cute kid~ - _Kachirou_.

Both of you are banned from the club. - _Ryoma_.

Only Ryuuzaki-sensei has that authority! - _Kachirou_.

The intercom buzzed again. "Come out already, Ryoma. There's your favorite Ponta in the fridge," Yukimura promised.

I'm not falling for it. - _Ryoma_.

It's not a lie. - _Tezuka_.

 **(Picture uploaded)** - _Fuji_.

Wtf holy shit - _Katsuo_.

Is that a fridge full of Ponta? - _Kawamura_.

So loved~! - _Kachirou_.

...I'm going to bed. - _Kaidoh_.

Yeah me too - _Momo_.

They're trying to trap me and you just want to sleep. You're the worst senpai ever. - _Ryoma_.

It sounds like they've already succeeded in trapping you. - _Kachirou_.

Ya. - _Fuji_.

How casual... - _Inui_.

Well, if Tezuka and Fujiko are already there, I'm going back to bed then too. - _Kawamura_.

Good night! - _Kachirou_.

Don't leave me alone with them. - _Ryoma_.

You've already been alone with us. - _Tezuka_.

And that's my cue to leave. - _Momo_.

Tezuka, if you're sure... I trust you... But please be kind to Echizen. He's obviously feeling intimidated. - _Oishi_.

I'm not. - _Ryoma_.

... - _Katsuo_.

Have fun, Ochibi~ - _Kikumaru_.

No wait - _Ryoma_.

Good night, everyone. - _Tezuka_.

Lol it was an order lolol - _Kachirou_.

The group chat went quiet. Ryoma inwardly groaned; of course Tezuka would still have a hold on them. He still felt like a captain to Ryoma, and that had been two years ago. His phone buzzed with another group chat. Ryoma blinked at it.

Ryoma, aren't you tired? - _Fuji_.

Ryoma glowered at it. The more Fuji reminded him, the more sleepy he got - he knew that was what the sadist wanted. He wouldn't fall for it!

No. - _Ryoma_.

Oh, he replies here? - _Yukimura_.

It turns out he's an avid texter. So cute~ - _Fuji_.

Echizen come out already. - _Atobe_.

This would be easier if your house wasn't so ridiculously big. - _Sanada_.

If it wasn't, the brat would have hopped the fence and been long gone. - _Atobe_.

So you admit it was a trap! - _Ryoma_.

Ya. - _Fuji_.

Where are you? Come out. We can have a snack if you're hungry. - _Tezuka_.

Ooh, he's even offering late night snacks! You have him wrapped around your little finger, Ryoma~ - _Fuji_.

I wouldn't mind having him wrapped around me either~ - _Yukimura_.

I bet he's blushing now :) - _Fuji_.

(kiss) - _Yukimura_.

The brat is never going to come out at this rate - _Atobe_.

Nope - _Ryoma_.

So stubborn! - _Fuji_.

Well the first floor is clear - _Sanada_.

Same for the second floor - _Yukimura_.

Just how determined were they to find him? Ryoma hadn't expected them to start sweeping the house from the ground up!

Good thing this is one of my family's smaller homes. - _Atobe_.

Five stories is considered small...? - _Sanada_.

Stop looking for me. I've died and ascended to Heaven. - _Ryoma_.

We'll show you heaven. (kiss) - _Yukimura_.

Ryoma. Come out. - _Tezuka_.

Let's get a snack and go back to bed. - _Sanada_.

The door opened to the room he was in. Ryoma didn't move from the corner, keeping still as footsteps echoed in his ears.

I win. - _Atobe_.

Ryoma didn't get to make a reply, as he was effortlessly scooped up, sheets and all, into Atobe's arms. The other male looked mildly irritated, sleep-mussed hair in disarray, but Ryoma noted - bitterly - that the other boy had somehow donned pants.

"Where did you get pants!" Ryoma snapped out.

Atobe blinked, then chuckled. "It's my house, brat. I know where the clothes are."

"Asshole!" Ryoma said. He would have smacked the other, but his hands were trapped in his impromptu cocoon of blankets. Struggling seemed futile; not only was he too sore and tired to do much, Atobe seemed to be oddly capable at restraining him.

Atobe took him to the kitchen, where he was effortlessly dumped into a chair at the counter. Keeping a firm hand on his shoulder, Atobe took out his phone.

Kitchen, 3rd floor. - _Atobe_.

It wasn't long before the others arrived, in various states of dishevelment but all sporting pajama pants. Ryoma found himself more irritated by the pants than anything.

"Interesting way to start the day," Fuji quipped, pecking Ryoma on the head.

Ryoma glared at him.

"Good call on hiding the clothes, Gen," Seiichi acknowledged with a laugh. "It managed to impede him just long enough from escaping."

At that, Ryoma grew alarmed. "Just how much of this was planned?"

"Everything from the very beginning," Sanada answered.

* * *

 **A/N** : I have no excuse for this, other than that it's been rattling in my head so it needed to be out. φ(．．;)

Part II is done, will be posted soon.

Thank you for reading! _**Please be kind a drop a review.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N** : And now my games won't run?! Whyyyy...

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own Prince of Tennis.

 **Warnings** : OT6, Crack-Humor, Text-based format

* * *

 **The 3AM Blues**

 _Part II_

* * *

Saturday morning had dawned beautifully, and even breakfast time had passed, Kachirou found himself enjoying the weather. He was seated at one of the picnic tables at his father's tennis courts, idly watching Sakuno and Tomoka playing a friendly rally and looking at his phone in consideration. It had been a quiet morning, which after three years in the tennis circuit, was too much of a rare occurrence. Almost suspiciously so, especially considering all the excitement of the very early morning texts. With a grin - which Katsuo, seated across from him, studiously pretended not to see - Kachirou's fingers danced over the screen over his phone as he decided to get the whole thing rolling.

Good morning~! - _Kachirou_.

Katsuo's cellphone pinged, which had the other boy quickly turning it into silent mode and glancing over at Kachirou with a look that demanded 'why?'

How did you get my number? - _Mukahi_.

Why are you here? - _Kikumaru_.

Why are YOU here? - _Mukahi_.

Why am I here - _Marui_.

Lol - _Yanagi_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

The greatest thing about the tennis players they knew, was that not only were they super interconnected - most were also early-risers due to their lifestyles. Even someone like Kachirou, who at best could be described as distantly-related to the former monsters of the junior high tennis circuit, had managed to gather their contact information due to his own diligence and ties to Ryoma, seeing as the Seigaku captain hated having to respond to every single invite from the group at large.

Echizen! Did you survive! - _Momo_.

Kachirou could always rely on Momoshirou.

What - _Shishido_.

Lol what happened to him - _Jackal_.

Atobe gobbled him up - _Kachirou_.

WHAT - _Mukahi_.

Poor Ochibi! - _Kikumaru_.

With Atobe as his sugar daddy, the last thing he'll be is poor. - _Oshitari_.

Lolol good point, Yuushi! - _Mukahi_.

Katsuo was staring at him. His eyes were screaming. "This is why you weren't picked to be vice-captain," Kachirou smiled at him.

Maybe I should have picked him up last night after all... - _Oishi_.

Don't mind~ Don't mind~ - _Kikumaru_.

Please mind. - _Ryoma_.

Oh! - _Kachirou_.

He lives! - _Mukahi_.

"Because I'm sane?" Katsuo asked the air.

Did you ever escape Atobe's house? - _Momo_.

No. - _Atobe_.

Atobe~ You wolf~ - _Niou_.

Ya. - _Fuji_.

Fuji-senpai says 'ya' like he wasn't there being a wolf himself... - _Kachirou_.

What - _Jackal_.

Traitors. - _Ryoma_.

What. - _Marui_.

Lolol you just added punctuation to what Jackal said lolol - _Niou_.

No 'puri'? - _Momo_.

I'm not gonna type it out puri - _Niou_.

You just did. - _Yagyuu_.

No I didn't puri - _Niou_.

... - _Yagyuu_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

Kachirou loved this group. It made the current set of Seishun Gakuen senior high school Regulars look positively rational. "Ryoma-kun's awake," he notified his friend.

First you guys abandon me and now you aren't even acknowledging your traitorous ways. Unbelievable. - _Ryoma_.

Hey! We didn't know about any of this! - _Shishido_.

Excuses. - _Ryoma_.

Actually, why are the Rikkai tennis players here? -Momo.

Mostly because Kachirou wanted maximize the number of people who knew, and Rikkai seemed a safe bet to start that jumping off point. He wasn't going to admit that aloud, however.

What, now you don't want us here? Rude. - _Kirihara_.

Akaya's here?! Why were you so quiet? - _Marui_.

Becuz I didn't care. - _Kirihara_.

Then LEAVE, wtf. - _Shishido_.

To be fair, considering this is Echizen's private business... Maybe we should all leave... - _Ohtori_.

Choutarou is right - _Shishido_.

Do you ever choke on his dick, considering it's shoved so deep into your throat? - _Kirihara_.

Woah woah woah, let's keep this chat room PG! - _Momo_.

Lol we were originally talking about Ryoma-kun's orgy from last night, how PG can you expect it to be lol - _Kachirou_.

ORGY? - _Mukahi_.

omg - _Yanagi_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

? - _Inui_.

Kachirou glanced back up at Katsuo in obvious challenge. "You don't even care about Ryoma-kun's well-being? That's terrible!" he said in faux-outrage.

Wait

Atobe had an orgy with Echizen last night? - _Kirihara_.

Stop calling it an orgy - _Ryoma_.

What term would you prefer, man-storm? - _Kachirou_.

Man-pile? - _Mukahi_.

Man-on-man extravaganza? - _Niou_.

Tennis Players, down and dirty? - _Yagyuu_.

Love-fifteen? ;) - _Oshitari_.

omfg - _Momo_.

Lol - _Inui_.

Lol - _Yanagi_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

Mamushi, stop it with the ellipses! - _Momo_.

With obvious reluctance, Katsuo picked up his phone and started reading through the messages.

So Atobe had a triple-layered manwich with Echizen? LAST NIGHT? - _Kirihara_.

Omfg just go back to orgy - _Ryoma_.

And with Tezuka-buchou and Fuji-senpai. - _Kachirou_.

...wow - _Niou_.

Echizen... your body is a lot more durable than I thought ;) - _Oshitari_.

:) - _Fuji_.

LAST NIGHT? - _Kirihara_.

YES LAST NIGHT dammit Kirihara - _Shishido_.

LAST NIGHT - _Kirihara_.

hd;fdhiofjjfsdk - _Shishido_.

di sfhioduf;dfdi - _Mukahi_.

What you doing? - _Kikumaru_.

Helping him. ;hsfuidsjfjds; - _Mukahi_.

Do you have a point to this exclamation, Akaya? - _Yanagi_.

LAST NIGHT - _Kirihara_.

ARRRRGGGHHHH! - _Shishido_.

Mura-buchou and Sanada-jerk went to Atobe's too. I remember because I wanted to play tennis on the street courts with Buchou but he said he had plans with Atobe last night. - _Kirihara_.

 _...oh. -Jackal._

WHAT - _Momo_.

WHAT - _Kaidoh_.

FIVE out of FIVE, Ryoma-kun! Mystery solved! - _Kachirou_.

Die in a fire. - _Ryoma_.

Katsuo audibly sighed.

Echizen, I never realized... What an insatiable appetite you have... - _Oshitari_.

:) - _Fuji_.

Stop that! - _Oshitari_.

:) - _Fuji_.

Ok well um congratulations? - _Katsuo_.

"Nice support," Kachirou laughed.

Thank you - _Yukimura_.

Thanks - _Fuji_.

We don't need it but Ore-sama can appreciate such gestures. - _Atobe_.

Katsuo, 100 laps right now. - _Ryoma_.

Another audible sigh from the boy across from him. Kachirou giggled.

What a dictator - _Momo_.

Momo-senpai, 100 laps for you too. - _Ryoma_.

?! - _Momo_.

Ryoma says 'thank you' too. - _Fuji_.

No he doesn't. - _Ryoma_.

Congrats on the all the D~ - _Mukahi_.

Gakuto. - _Atobe_.

Congrats to you too, Buchou ;) - _Mukahi_.

...thank you. - _Atobe_.

Lol he just gave up - _Niou_.

Why have I heard no congratulations from my Rikkai teammates? I'm hurt - _Yukimura_.

Congrats - _Niou_.

Congratulations! - _Marui_.

We offer you our full support, of course, Seiichi and Gen. - _Yanagi_.

Congrats! - _Jackal_.

My condolences, Echizen. - _Yagyuu_.

This is hilarious. - _Kirihara_.

? - _Yukimura_.

That didn't sound very supportive, Yagyuu. Akaya. - _Sanada_.

Oh Sanada finally spoke! - _Kikumaru_.

Btw guys, congrats. - _Kawamura_.

Ya. - _Akutagawa_.

Jiroh, did you wake up just to type that? How touching. - _Atobe_.

Ya. - _Akutagawa_.

Yeah, I'm real emotionally moved right now. - _Mukahi_.

"Who are you guys texting?" Osakada asked from the court.

"Ryoma-kun," Kachirou said, at the same time Katsuo replied drolly with "Regret."

Oh! Yes, that reminds me - how are you, Echizen? Are you okay? - _Oishi_.

No. - _Ryoma_.

Yes. - _Fuji_.

Yes. - _Sanada_.

He's great! - _Yukimura_.

He's a spoiled brat. - _Atobe_.

Lol I'm so excited for this relationship already puri - _Niou_.

You didn't save me last night, senpai. When I die, you're the first I'll haunt. -Ryoma.

!s;fdsafni;dasf; - _Oishi_.

Oh, DRAMA. - _Kachirou_.

I fed him a luxurious breakfast and have been pampering him all day, and he still has no appreciation. - _Atobe_.

I hate croissants. I want a Japanese breakfast. - _Ryoma_.

Lolol take your luxury and shove it - _Shishido_.

Tomoka leaned over Kachirou's shoulder, reading the messages in obvious interest. The girl could always be counted on to add to the chaos, and Kachirou was rather fond of her himself these days. "Ryoma-kun's romantic entanglements are currently being discussed," he explained to the girl.

You shouldn't have rushed him. - _Oishi_.

Ya. - _Ryoma_.

He's fine, Oishi. - _Fuji_.

Poor Ochibi~ He just wanted a slow romance~ - _Kikumaru_.

Oh? - _Atobe_.

Hm? - _Fuji_.

Romance... - _Yukimura_.

It was already very romantic. - _Sanada_.

I'm dying i'm dying - _Kachirou_.

Me too lololol - _Mukahi_.

It was romantic? - _Momo_.

From the way Ryoma was phrasing it, you'd think you guys had locked him in the house and had your wicked way with him - _Katsuo_.

Lolol "wicked way" who still uses that phrase lol - _Kirihara_.

It was very romantic! Candlelight dinner, slow dancing, soft music... - _Yukimura_.

Gen and Keigo even danced the waltz for us - _Fuji_.

I wanna see a six-person group waltz - _Kikumaru_.

Ryoma refused to dance with me :( - _Fuji_.

"...I wish I could say I was surprised," Tomoka admitted. Sakuno, who had taken a seat next to Katsuo, was blushing as the boy shared his screen with her.

Wth. That's obviously a romantic date. - _Kirihara_.

Shut up - _Ryoma_.

Omg Ryoma did you not realize? - _Katsuo_.

omfg of course he didn't - _Momo_.

I did too! - _Ryoma_.

We've been going out for a year now. - _Fuji_.

"...Huh," Tomoka and Kachirou made equally-identical grunts of acknowledgement.

...what - _Mukahi_.

WHAT - _Kikumaru_.

WHAT! - _Oishi_.

Oh, I wasn't expecting that amount of passion from you, Oishi. - _Oshitari_.

Lol - _Yanagi_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

Brat always runs off afterwards. We had to switch to a larger house just to stall him. - _Atobe_.

And it worked~! - _Yukimura_.

... - _Ryoma_.

Well, uhm, maybe he just wasn't feeling...ready... -Oishi.

It's our fifth time. And he initiated it. - _Sanada_.

We always have consent. - _Atobe_

It's only afterwards that he runs off. - _Yukimura_.

Maybe he doesn't want to cuddle? - _Yagyuu_.

Lol what a strong resentment against cuddling - _Mukahi_.

But we like cuddling him~ - _Fuji_.

Katsuo sighed again.

Maybe you should have waited until marriage? - _Oishi_.

... - _Fuji_.

... - _Yukimura_.

... - _Sanada_.

... - _Atobe_.

Oishi-senpai wtf -Momo.

How would that even work? Don't care. Wanna see it. - _Niou_.

"And here comes the groom... And here comes the other groom... And yes, still another groom, everyone..." - _Marui_.

(star eyes) - _Mukahi_.

There's six of them, so they could pair off if they wanted legal marriages. - _Inui_.

...Same-sex marriage isn't legal in Japan. - _Kaidoh_.

Oh right - _Momo_.

Does everyone have a passport? - _Kachirou_.

Do we need one? Atobe flew us around in a giant amusement park. Why is the law stopping him now. - _Shishido_.

Oh you're right - _Atobe_.

NO. - _Ryoma_.

Well of course not right now

We'll have to wait until Ryoma graduates high school first - _Yukimura_.

This is great.

I'm so happy I'm alive at this exact moment to see this conversation. - _Kachirou_.

KACHIROU RUN LAPS UNTIL YOU DIE - _Ryoma_.

Oh god you're gonna be so high-maintenance huh - _Mukahi_.

He is. - _Sanada_.

He is. - _Atobe_.

Keigo is pretty high-maintenance too. - _Yukimura_.

Yes but I can afford myself. - _Atobe_.

Lol it's true lolol - _Marui_.

"Sugar daddy?" Tomoka muttered. Across the table, Katsuo choked on air as Kachirou burst into laughter.

Ochibi are you still at Atobe's place? - _Kikumaru_.

Why do you need to know? - _Sanada_.

Oh wow possessive much? - _Mukahi_.

Ya. Save me. - _Ryoma_.

What a casual cry for help... - _Oshitari_.

No one's allowed over. We're having a romantic weekend date. - _Atobe_.

No one was gonna go over anyway, geez! - _Shishido_.

Why isn't Tezuka talking at all? - _Oishi_.

Lol Are you serious? - _Niou_.

He CAN communicate you know, he's not always quiet - _Oishi_.

I'll say. ;) - _Yukimura_.

OMFG - _Momo_

...I wanna leave this chatroom. - _Kaidoh_.

Same. - _Shishido_.

Thirded. - _Jackal_.

All of you, 100 laps. - _Tezuka_.

! - _Kikumaru_.

Geez, do we have to say your name to summon you? Is that how it works? - _Kirihara_.

You can't give us laps, Tezuka, you're not our club captain. - _Oshitari_.

100 laps. - _Atobe_.

Ok this is just unfair. - _Mukahi_.

Agreed - _Ryoma_.

"He doesn't sound too happy..." Sakuno observed.

...Echizen, if you ever need to talk, you can call me... - _Oishi_.

What a good mom. - _Oshitari_.

Back off! - _Kikumaru_.

I need a ride. And possibly a plane ticket to out of the country. - _Ryoma_.

I can take you anywhere you want. - _Atobe_.

Even to Heaven ;) - _Yukimura_.

... - _Ryoma_.

Cheer up, Echizen. At least you'll be well-fed. - _Yagyuu_.

Hey he's not a pet! - _Momo_.

That would be a whole other kink on a whole other level. - _Mukahi_.

Nooooo Ochibiiii! - _Kikumaru_.

We're actually quite diligent as boyfriends, you know. - _Fuji_.

And doting. - _Atobe_.

Tch. - _Ryoma_.

Maybe he needs more space? - _Ohtori_.

I already gave him an entire floor of the mansion. - _Atobe_.

WTF - _Kirihara_.

...Do you want a house? - _Atobe_.

No. - _Ryoma_.

You will never make a proper gold-digger, Echizen. - _Oshitari_.

Maybe he just doesn't like you guys puri. - _Niou_.

fduiafhnf;a - _Sanada_.

? - _Yagyuu_.

Dropped my phone, sorry. - _Sanada_.

...wait

Are you saying

What are you saying? - _Katsuo_.

OMG OCHIBI! YOU WERE FORCED?! - _Kikumaru_.

No. - _Ryoma_.

Oh

Um

Ok. That's...good... - _Katsuo_.

...you almost made them cry. - _Ryoma_.

What - _Marui_.

Did not. - _Atobe_.

Omg - _Shishido_.

There were better ways to phrase that, Niou. - _Yagyuu_.

Sorry puri. Just wanted to be sure. - _Niou_.

I wasn't. Going to cry. - _Sanada_.

He's a weeper. - _Ryoma_.

Honestly, I know I shouldn't be, but I'm amused. - _Kachirou_.

Don't be so mean to them, Echizen~ - _Oshitari_.

Their faces went all slack for a moment. So stupid. - _Ryoma_.

Lol you must feel bad, you stopped asking to escape lolol - _Kirihara_.

"...where did you even get their numbers?" Tomoka asked.

Kachirou shrugged, "Here and there. Sometimes some of them called me to get in contact with Ryoma-kun, since he wouldn't pick up their calls."

You never even told them you liked them and it's been a year? - _Shishido_.

None of your business. - _Ryoma_.

Don't worry, senpai. He likes you. Otherwise he really would have escaped by now. - _Momo_.

We already know that. - _Fuji_.

Uh huh - _Marui_.

Now it's actually pretty cute. - _Kikumaru_.

Tsundere~ - _Niou_.

He is. - _Fuji_.

Punishment time. - _Yukimura_.

Wait whaalsudbsu;fdjatg - _Ryoma_.

Do we want to know? - _Oshitari_.

Nah - _Fuji_.

 **(Picture uploaded.)** -Sanada.

LOLOLOL - _Mukahi_.

I'm dying again - _Kachirou_.

Awww - _Kikumaru_.

I'm mildly disappointed to see you all clothed. - _Oshitari_.

:) - _Fuji_.

...like trying to hug a cat. - _Jackal_.

Ya - _Yukimura_.

So this is how you guys handle him? Hug therapy? - _Shishido_.

Ya - _Atobe_.

... - _Kaidoh_.

Ah, the ellipses of judgment have returned. - _Yanagi_.

"I'm gonna get some drinks," Katsuo said, standing to flee.

Wow, Tezuka is really used to it. - _Marui_.

Ryoma always leaves scratch marks 3 - _Fuji_.

It's cute - _Sanada_.

! - _Marui_.

! - _Jackal_.

What are you, punctuation partners? - _Yagyuu_.

Well, let's leave them to it. - _Oishi_.

Lol He gave up - _Mukahi_.

Definitely gave up lolol - _Niou_.

Have fun on your romantic weekend, Ryoma-kun~! - _Kachirou_.

fdhgfuipadfidjnldf -Ryoma.

Translation: You're guiding the first years' practice for the next two weeks. - _Sanada_.

NO WAY THAT'S NOT FAIR - _Kachirou_.

Have fun :) - _Momo_.

fbdufd;fdf - _Ryoma_.

Translation: You owe me burgers. - _Fuji_.

From WHEN? - _Momo_.

Why. I can buy you burgers. I can buy you filet mignon burgers. Brat. - _Atobe_.

It's the principle of the matter, Keigo. - _Yukimura_.

Ya - _Ryoma_.

Oh? You can type again? - _Oshitari_.

He's sitting in Tezuka's lap now. - _Fuji_.

 **(Picture uploaded.)** -Yukimura.

Stop showing them! - _Ryoma_.

But it's cute - _Yukimura_.

That's our cue. Bye! - _Shishido_.

Don't give them too much trouble, Echizen! - _Oshitari_.

Unlikely. - _Atobe_.

Mada mada dane. - _Ryoma_.

* * *

 **A/N** : Thank you for reading!

Please be kind and drop a review. :)


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